When I met my first gay friend it happened to be a new world to me and quite honestly, I had mixed feelings about it but I didn’t feel awkward. He wasn’t ready to tell me the truth at the beginning, and I wanted him to use his time to get comfortable with our friendship. Supporting this guy I discovered much about the life of gay people. I fell to thinking of the reality I knew nothing about in the past. It happened to be a kind of revolution in my ideas of life. I was proud of his courage and felt deeply for him at the same time. We got drunk once, and I confessed I might be attracted to women. “I wouldn’t like you to be gay in our society”, he said. Yeah, now when I have come out as a bisexual I understand the true meaning of his words. It’s like an ordeal you have to go through. You can either accept your love or deny it.
My friend lives now in another country where he feels much better, and I’m very glad about it. But what does it mean? If I want to feel free being bisexual I need to leave my country? Sounds ridiculous, you see. And it really hurts. But there is a deal of truth in it. I’m not afraid of being judged by others. It’s my life and I do my best to live it the way I want to. I will never sacrifice my love in order to please the haters. A rebel has always lived inside of me. I hate this injustice. But I don’t want my family and friends to be judged or blamed by others. Homosexuality is often taken as a sin but who the devil told us that? There are lots of other things to be considered as real sins. I grew up in this country, and now you tell me I can’t be myself here?!
I’m a bisexual but I’ve not had a girlfriend yet. How can I do it if people are afraid of being who they are here? There are no gay women in my social circle. Or maybe they just keep their sexuality from others. And if I fall in love with a woman I won’t be able to agree with the reality according to which this love is considered as something “strange”. I can’t help thinking that it’s gonna be hard to walk the streets peacefully hand in hand with my lover enjoying the moment because there always will be those who will try to insult or even worse laugh at us. I don’t understand why they laugh; I wish they knew how sad the life of a gay can be. I’m a conscious citizen who needs to be protected, not rejected by the society. I’m a part of this society like anybody else. It’s hard to get how people can be so kind to some and so cruel to others.
There are things I don’t like, there are people I don’t understand but it doesn’t give me a right to insult anybody. I know we cannot accept all the things existing in nature just because we are different, but we need to remember every human being has their feelings, beliefs and preferences. Who says we need to follow the majority? Who can say what will happen in the future? The majority doesn’t necessarily discover the right way. You can build your promising future only being a personality. We need to be who we are. If you deny yourself you will never be truly happy. It’s impossible to find the balance if you live your whole life in struggle. Tell me why some are in a position to do whatever they want to, when others have to suffer and hide their true feelings because of those ridiculous fears and prejudices?
What is a norm to you? A rule adopted by the majority? As far as I know it’s a sin to steal and kill, but love is not a sin. Homosexuality has always existed. It was not a usual thing to talk about in the past but now it’s time to tell the truth. Love is love. And all those laws are made by people who need love. It reminds me of a doctor who tells you how harmful smoking is to your health but then goes outside to light his cigarette.